We had another lovely crew event last Thursday. This time, we campaigned for equal rights in our beloved game, raising awareness to the many ways in which gender imbalance pervades throughout our culture, and bringing out our better inner feminists with a healthy range of protest actions. But first of all, thanks all feminists for joining: maynexus, insane, mathilya, villem, may, mattie, sal, doozy, witt, and threep.

To start, we assembled in our protest vehicles at Los Santos City Hall. There, mathilya reminded everyone of that old saying “size does not matter” by bringing both the smallest and largest of protest cars. After some glitchy breakdancing on the blades of doozle’s helicopter, we tried to ascend city hall. This proved quite the challenge, especially for yours truly, but after about 10 attempts, even I managed to get on top of the building. Thanks to everyone for spawning their Oppressors Mk II for me and apologies for any accidental scratches. We showed Los Santos who’s the boss!

After jumping ourselves to death off the building, and respawning nearby, we went on a feminist protest march. Our first stop, using the scenic route thanks to my ever so accurate sense of orientation, was Vinewood Police Station. We knocked on the door to apply for our police certificates (after all, we are the ethical retinue, and surely GTA Online can use more ethical female cops). However, unfortunately the doors remained shut. Consequently, a protest sit-down for more female cops followed.

Despite their door remaining closed, the cops of Los Santos kept following us around for the remainder of our protest march. Perhaps this was for our own protection. Or perhaps not, as they impounded various members’ vehicles during our protest.

Next, we visited the Vanilla Unicorn. Indeed, with no male strippers ever on stage, what better way to stage a protest then to take the stage ourselves?

Our final stop was a nearby clothing store in Los Santos city. It has been long observed that options for female clothing are severely lacking. In silent protest, we put our pants on fire.

Next, we started the playlist, with female themed races, a sumo job, adversary modes, and protest deathmatches. For best rioter, villem earns a riot girl of the week title. As best sumo fighter, threep earns a sumo lady of the week title. And due to a miraculous escape during the adversary mode, mathilya earns a lady sprinter of the week title. And for best looking feminist, sal earns our traditional swag of the week title. The winner of the playlist was witt, with stellar performance as always, with mathilya in 2nd place, and insane and myself tied for 3rd place. That earns our top feminist witt a woman of the week title on discord. Congratulations everyone!

As usual, you can enjoy some pictures below, kindly provided by insane and myself. A recording of the party is on twitch. I already look forward to our next event.

Hopefully, our protests will be heard, and we look forward to a future DLC to address the obvious and pervasive gender imbalance in GTA Online, or failing that, in their future games.