Gone For A While

[Anonymous]

I’ve suffered from depression for years now, but over the past ~8 months it’s greatly worsened. For half of those 8 months I’ve been medicated… unsuccessfully, so I’m still firmly stuck with all the nasty negatives. If you’re wondering why I’m bringing this up, it’s because one of those negatives is an almost complete lack of enjoyment in most things.

Unfortunately, that extends to crew-related activities too; I’ve found that over the past month or so, all events I’ve attended just felt like a necessary chore. Because of this, I’ve decided to take a leave of absence for an undetermined amount of time while I get my head sorted out; I’m going to see my doctor again soon to hopefully get that train going, but we’re likely going to be well into 2018 before any meaningful progress is made.

It wouldn’t make sense for me to retain the rank of Commissioner, so anyone with the authority to demote me is welcome to do so.
Additionally, both mattiejas and mathilya have editor rights for the Crew Events spreadsheet, so I’ll leave it to them while I’m gone.

I’ll still be floating around GTA so feel free to say hi.

[KuroAkame]

Well I hope you can get over it we will be here if you need something, what I mean by this is if you need to talk with someone from the crew or so, I think this crew is kind of our 2nd family, but yeah it’s better to talk with someone closer than us but if you still need to talk we will be here, I actually dunno what depression is cuz I never got one so keep in mind to be positive and think on the future and let the past behind, ofc it’s hard but i’m really sure that you can get over it, (this might be out of context) but I’ve been doing a work about Violence and it kind of bring ppl down such as bringing down your motivation and stuff like that.

So yeah if you need something we will be here to help you out and make stuff more happier, I guess, so have a nice rest from gta and be happy I’m really sure you can get over that stuff, sometimes it’s better thinking near the ocean with the waves exploding xD just dont stay in the dark cuz there is always a light at the end of the tunnel and I know that you can reach that light and be happy 😀

regards,

-Kuro

[mattiejas]

It’s incredibly brave of you to come out about your depression, dee. I’m really sorry to hear that you’re suffering personally. Above all, be kind and gentle to yourself, and give yourself the time. Many people will probably not really understand what you are going through even if they try very hard, and that can be though. But some will understand. Whatever is hurting you, for whatever reason, we are here for you.

You’ve done a really great job contributing to the positive atmosphere in the crew, and also helping out with practical things, fully deserving of commissioner status. But, I agree with you that it is sensible given the circumstances that you’d like to take a step back. So at your request, I have moved you down in the hierarchy back to representative. When you feel you’re again ready for it, just tell me and I will reinstate your rank. Whenever that is.

Thanks again for letting us know. Please take the very best care of yourself. Whenever we see you around in the GTA world, we will do our best to take the best care of you as well, and to ensure that you have a good and pleasant experience. After all, that is what Ethical Retinue is all about.

[Roofstone]

I know where you are at. I used to suffer quite a bit in my younger years after I got muted. It is a chore and a vicious cycle, and I cannot commend your bravery enough for coming clean about it. That takes a lot out of you. You’ve been a credit to the crew and a brilliant officer, and when you come back I am sure you will continue to be. My hat goes off to you, hun. Keep on keeping on!

[mathilya]

I’m sorry to hear that 🙁 Well, I think my forespeakers expressed everything I could say here – I’ll just add that you are very brave you shared all your problems at public forum. Get well soon.

[REACHER217]

well first am sorry to hear that u have such a big problem but on the other hand am glad to hear that u r taking actions against the depression and welling to get better, ,, am not much of a speaker and my english isn’t good enough but i really really hope for you to get better ,,keep ur faith and may god be with you ,, may god be with you

[doozledoo34]

Oh Deedee..

I wish you patience and strong believe in the progress of yourself so you can always remember you will someday master your weaknesses and conquer your fears.

May the Force be with you.

[–Threepwood–]

That sucks 🙁
You’re a great gal, Dee. I wish you all the best!

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